Are you a bit of a scholar? Do you have troubles getting down to earth, or even trying to escape your ivory tower?

Me, I have more information in my head than I could ever get around to using. I am a cerebral type. I have a lot of fire, a lot of theory, floating around my mind.

How to we translate that into behaviour? How to we get from idea to implementation? I think that’s part of my journey. Is it part of yours?

What have you tried? Leave a comment, I’m genuinely looking for problems to this situation.

I have tried starting with theory and moving down toward action, but I tend to find myself about halfway to a practical solution before I run out of steam. It’s like I’m climbing down the side of a hill and my rope runs out.

It’s not a mountain, I might be able to continue down without a rope, but it would be difficult. On top of that, it feels like there’s an invisible barrier in the way. Frustrating.

What if we turn this upside-down? What if I started with the practical? Let’s try it.

When I look at personality information about a person, I like to start with theory and look for examples that fit. But wait, doesn’t that encourage bias?

Yes. It’s called confirmation bias.

What if we did the reverse? What if I asked for stories from a person’s life? What if I asked for their problems, what’s bothering them?

Then I could look at their personality information and help them find a solution.

I think this is a good way forward.

Let’s Try this in Practice. Here’s an Example.

Think about it. What if we’re talking to a man with the following personality details:

ESFJ, Capricorn sun and rising, Gemini moon, earth element, male, and for fun we’ll throw in a chronotype. He’s an early riser.

I could analyze this information and tell you that this is a hardworking individual. He leads with the judging function of extroverted feeling, shortened to Fe. Fe is all about caring for others and the social environment.

He is also earth, practical, detail-oriented. Being a judging type and a Capricorn means that he likes to get things done and is always pushing himself. This fits with the early riser. He is the early bird who gets the worm, but he’s also caring.

The Gemini moon might mean he is talkative, or just that he needs to talk through his emotions. But earth signs aren’t very talkative, they’re introverted. But wait, we have a contradiction, isn’t ESFJ extroverted? That’s what the E stands for. How confusing!

Now we’re starting to churn in our theory.

This is where we get lost. We’re losing track of the individual and getting sucked into theory. Theory is broad, reality is specific.

So we pause and ask him, what is troubling you in your life?

He says, he wants to be more social. He likes people, but they find him hard-headed. He wants to get along and make friends, but people don’t seem to like him, and find him too pushy.

Wow. I immediately jump to that Capricorn/Gemini conflict. The ESFJ, led by Extroverted Feeling, contrasting with the early-rising earth personality. This is someone who can get in the rut of impersonal work work work, get it done. Yet he has this social side.

And they have met in conflict.

I have found his individual issue in his theory, and I can search for a solution there.

So what is the solution?

The Gemini moon means that he is best talking about his feelings. His feelings, not his work. It could be that he would succeed if he focused on work during the day, and after work he switched to a more social mode.

In his 4 letter code, we see his functions by looking at the two middle characters. ESFJ, that means he leads with F, Feeling, and his secondary function is Introverted Sensing. Ah, I think, Sensing is considered more earthy, and it’s introverted.

I would conclude one thing right out of the gates. Our example man must be exhausted. It seems he’s over-relying on his second function, the Sensing function. He’s a social butterfly caught in a solitary 9-to-5 grind.

“What do I do?” He asks.

Now that I’ve made clear connections between his theory and his life, I’m full of practical, real life answers that stem from the intellectual theory.

“First, you should focus on work when you’re at work. When you’re in the Introverted Sensing, earthy, Capricorn mindset, you’re not really in the mood to be a people person. That might explain why people find you hard headed. You’re being earthy!”

Then I would add, “It looks like you’re not currently living to your strengths. Your 4 letter code indicates that you’re a people person foremost, and a workaholic second. You should be working for the sake of helping people you’re connecting with. Fe and Si in harmony.”

He thinks about this. “But I barely have friends. People at work already don’t like me.”

I already have a practical solution. But I want to tailor it to his individual experiences. So I ask a question.

“Do you feel like you have two sides? This hard working, no-nonsense side, and the more sociable side? The sociable part of you might even feel more natural.”

He thinks. “It does feel more natural, when I am talking to my close friends. And I really do feel like I have two sides. My quiet, hard working self, and my more chatty side.”

I nod. This is part of the earth type. In ancient temperament theory, earth is associated with the Melancholic type. This is an introvert, but he also values close connections. This is a point of harmony between his earth side and his Fe, Gemini personality components.

I say, “Good. What I want you to do is to find a club and join it. Maybe volunteer for charity, or join a community program. Whatever it is, don’t do it through work. I need you to learn about and strengthen your social side.”

Then I warn him. “Keep the hard-headed side out, but otherwise remember that you can still use this part of your personality to help other people. And, earth people are good with close relationships. They value family connections. Don’t be afraid to bring that part in, just be careful of the sharp edges.”

From here, I would ideally ask for a follow up conversation and see if everything went well.

But wow. Look at how quickly starting with a practical example takes us out of the the swirling theories, and instead lets us use it as a tool to find solutions and help people. We can even use it on ourselves to find opportunities for individual growth.

Thanks for reading,
this has been DT.